My Inner Forum

He stepped into my mind, his friends watching the screen.
His appearance interrupted my internal argument over the situation.
"You shouldn't be here." I said.
"Garnet, you've been hurt. Badly. Your body's dying. This was the only way we could think of to reach..."
"If we are hurt, I'm our only hope. Merge with me." The Alien said.
Caleb watched in shock as one of the shadows in my mind stepped forward, obviously inhuman while still eerily beautiful.
"I don't understand." He said.
"You don't need to merge with her. Let me cast a spell. Just one spell." The Witch said.
I turned to her.
"You were banished. You're unnecessary to my life now."
She came closer than I expected and I felt the Christian step out of the merge to face the Witch.
"I made a vow. She won't break it. Go back into the shadows. We don't need you anymore."
The Christian turned to me, annoyed.
"Why is she so close to you? You're considering it!"
I started to deny it when Fear stepped out of me, facing the Christian.
"We're dying. What if she can save us with a spell?"
The Christian, angry now, folded her arms.
"Would you rather live, having broken your vow to God never again to use witchcraft or die honorably, knowing you could look your Savior in the eye when you reach Heaven?"
The Witch scoffed, but stepped backwards when I hugged the Christian, making my decision.
The Christian turned to the witch, pointing her finger.
"I'm in dominance. Go away."
The Christian stepped into me, once again merged.
Fear, however, remained, trembling at Caleb's feet.
"What can we do? Are we gonna die?"
"I don't know. I don't even understand the technology that lets me be here."
The Alien, watching as the Witch cowered in the background, once again spoke, this time urgently.
"Let me out. We're stronger together than separated."
I turned to her, Fear jumping between us with a wail.
"What if no one likes us anymore? What if all they see is how strange and weird we look and act?"
The Alien waved her hand dismissively.
"Then we will continue until someone looks beyond."
Caleb looked at me, uncertainty tainting the concern in his eyes.
"You're an alien?"
I shrugged.
"Part of me is. The part that makes me different from you. The part from which I draw my strength. But it's also the part I'm ashamed to wear."
"No."
I turned to Fear in surprise.
"It's not shame. It's me. You want to be loved and I won't let you until I know there's no chance of being left...again."
The Alien shook her head, sighing in disbelief.
"This is irrelevant right now. Oh no...not you. Isn't it complicated enough already?"
Curious, I turned to my right, smiling at the me that had gracefully stepped forward, her eye on Caleb.
Her soft dress fluttered around her, making an inviting vision of sweetness.
"Hello Caleb."
She gently kissed the poor man, smiling at his shock.
"Which one are you?" He asked, mistified.
"I'm in love with you."
The Alien rolled her eyes, trying to bring my attention back to the issue at hand and I had to agree that my secret crush on Caleb would have to wait until later.
Caleb, however, had not recovered and was peppering Love with questions.
"How long have you...I mean, I had no idea. Really?"
With difficulty, I shut him out, enclosing them inside a box for the moment.
"How damaged are we?"
The Skeleton and The Muscles stepped forward, limping slightly, but no more than normal.
"Where then, is the damage?"
The Nervous System and The Veins stepped forward, leaking and shaking uncontrollably. "How do we fix you?"
They shrugged, obviously in great distress.
The Alien lifted her chin.
"You have no other options. Merging with me will activate everything now dormant."
"Not with Caleb here. We don't know what it would do to him."
I released the box, pulling the two mental representations apart when they seemed reluctant to end their close embrace.
"Caleb, you have to leave now. You might be permanently damaged if you're still in my mind when I merge with the Alien."
"Garnet, maybe there's another way. Are you going to look like her after you merge?"
"Quite possibly. See, we don't know. We've only done this once before and Fear's stopped us from ever doing it again."
"I don't like it."
"Caleb...she's me. Remember that. Just an aspect of me you've never met. As you've just experienced, some hidden aspects of me are rather pleasant."
Caleb suddenly grinned, though it dulled under the weight of his own fear.
"I'll leave, but please take care. We're all here waiting for you."
"Thank you."
I waited until he disappeared and then merged with Fear and the Alien, still unable to go near the Alien without Fear wailing.
The walls of my mind expanded until I could feel myself breathing again instead of just seeing the various representations of my body in the corner of my mind reserved for inward consultation.
I could hear the shocked breaths of my friends as I opened my eyes, seeing no color, but trillions of shades of grey that the Artist was still able to revel in, though in time, color would be missed.
The Alien's voice filled my mind.
~You wish to unmerge?~
~No. I need you. ~
"Garnet?"
Caleb was leaning over me, now, getting over his natural reaction to an inhuman creature laying on the table in place of his close friend...probably due to his seeing the Alien already.
The other two guys weren't as lucky and were still staring, fixed in place.
I stretched, feeling all the strange parts of my body as well as the familiar ones and realized my internal Body had changed as well, showing me my new Skeleton and other aspects.
I was still damaged, but with the liquids running through my body, I was able to stay alive long enough to heal.
The hard times I still had ahead of me would have to wait until I was ready to face them.


Garnet Leiah Hyneman
Friday, November 23, 2001 11:16:32 PM

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